Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
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