I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Be still, my beating vagina.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
