sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
