anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
