You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
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