Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
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how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
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We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.