I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
