i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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