a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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