But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
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if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
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Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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