If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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