why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I understand Curling. That high.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize