i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.