I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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