Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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