so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
