My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
