i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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