All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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