Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
