We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
