My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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