these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
