Jerry, you need to find god
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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