You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize