I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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