Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Fuck appropriateness.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Randomize
