So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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