I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
