i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
