go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
what day is it and did you see me today?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize
