I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I can't turn off my feet"
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
