i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize