wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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