It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
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