My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
You pole danced in your parka.
Can you bring me the toilet please
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
