I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
