Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
