At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Randomize
