Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
