Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
