ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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