I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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