Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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