Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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