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So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
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