We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
