While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
