A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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