Sry I called you an 8
Quick, to the slutcave!
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Randomize
