shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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