I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Watching her eat just hurts me
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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