the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Randomize
