I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
